Laurita, don't leave the forum.
Never, and I repeat: never, you are ashamed of being yourself, of expressing your ideas, your ways of thinking .... they can be better or worse, but they are yours, and the people around you (your mother especially)I should be able to accept yourself as you are.We all have things to improve, life is a continuous learning process, but you should not hide, repress you ... yourself, and be proud of it.
I encourage, and go ahead, always go ahead.